February 17, 2009

I know i'm probably wasting time that i do not have by doing this post.
But i just gotta let it out.
How can something that is so obviously right, feel so wrong.
I feel like i've been thrust into the limelight, somewhere i'm so not comfortable with.
All the while, I've been a part of something, and try my bestest to that something as best as i can.
Now i've been given the chance to make things happen.
I must admit, in the beginning, there was a bit of eagerness.
But now, not so sure.
Because it's like, it does not seem to fit well with everyone.
Eventually will it all be worth it?
Hate the way how everyone seems to take everything at face value.
Why can't one just try to stop and think for a moment.
Knowing this, it's not as if i'm faultless as well.
I understand that we are all selfish by nature.
On my own part, knowing it, and going to try do something about it.
No one sees me crack, sees me stumble.
Because i'm going to continually patch myself up.
Pick up and move on.
I know eventually I will be grateful for experiences like this, but I just don't see it now.
Somehow this kinda helped me see something about myself.
Valentine's just over, what does it really mean to me?
For like twice, waited with tinny anticipation that it would have been different.
But always up in smoke.
However, I realize now, that i've been looking for the wrong thing.
I'm not looking for someone to love.
I'm just looking for someone whom I can share my heart with.
The difference is that, the latter is selfish. As am I.
Because I realize that I'm searching for something I know nuts about.
So it seems that I still can't escape my inherent nature.
I make my own destiny, answerable to my own actions.
Trying to make the best out of everything i do.
No idea why this song came to my head.
But here goes..
Back to reality then..

Lifehouse- Fairy Tales and Castles.
He sighs and looks in the mirror
He can't tell anymore
Who he really is and who they believe him to be
And he sighs and walks in a thin line
Between what is and what could be
He's getting closer
To something he can't understand

Cause there's a crack in his plastic crown
And his throne of ice is melting
He climbed his ladder
And there was nothing there
And now it's a long way down

Cause on and on and on he goes dancing on the grave
Of what he thought was still alive
On and on and on he goes
Dancing in mansions made of twigs
And castles made of sand

He sighs his head is filled with
Cartoons and fairy tales
And he's trapped inside a dungeon of dolls
With smiles on their faces

He's built a pretty cage
Hit shows on a beautiful stage
With candy coated prison bars
And chains that look like jewelry

Cause there's a crack in his plastic crown
And his throne of ice is melting
He climbed his ladder
And there was nothing there
And now it's a long way down
Cause on and on and on he goes dancing on the grave
Of what he thought was still alive

On and on and on he goes
Dancing in mansions made of twigs
And castles made of sand

Cause he lives inside
Of fairy tails and castle lands
And there's room inside
For false expectations and illusions

Cause there's a crack in his plastic crown
And his throne of ice is melting
He climbed his ladder
And there was nothing there
And now it's a long way down
It's a long way down
Cause on and on and on he goes dancing on the grave
Of what he thought was still alive
On and on and on he goes
Dancing in mansions made of twigs
And castles made of sand
Cause on and on and on he goes dancing on the grave
Of what he thought was still alive
On and on and on he goes
Dancing in mansions made of twigs
And castles made of sand
Cause on and on and on he goes dancing on the grave
Of what he thought was still alive
On and on and on he goes
Dancing in mansions made of twigs
And castles made of sand

Posted by :]amu at 4:51 AM